Got a scare when the doctor said it might be a fracture. Turns out it's a ligament injury. Meniscus.

At a loss, I can't go command school because of my failed ippt, but my injuries are not severe enough to down pes. So I'm stuck somewhere in the middle. I have less than two weeks to try and get into the media team. Hopefully they'll reply me fast.

Just bought SWTOR, and spent the past few days partitioning my mac, downloading Windows 7, burning it to a disk, installing it. But that installation just won't work! Argh! So many people are having this problem, but from all the forums I go to, no one seems to have a workable solution. This is so frustratinggggg

Itch. Bites. Swollen toes. I notice all these only after field camp when you have no need for adrenaline to keep you going.

Pretty relaxing field camp as compared to other companies. Most enjoyable parts are the tactical formations and movements from point to point. Stuff that really makes you a soldier. I think I did pretty well for my Situational test, hoping to get into Sispec.

Sighted two wild boars. Looked like bloated pigs scurrying around. Magi mee in the field. Shivering in my jacket at night. Proning for the longest two hours in my life. Tanking all the shit from instructors because, well, first bed always gets all the shit. Getting commended from my SME. Heavy rain and lightning during declaration. Rifle getting stunned while digging shellscrape (FUCK). Proning in the mud. And realising I'm quite mentally prepared for all the shit happening around.

I love my home a lot more now. And I wanna watch Ghost protocol today. Jessie pick up your phone!

Even my bubble shield of calm happiness has cracks sometimes.

Second book in very soon. I have to find some way to live for and only myself. This dumb sucker trait is just too ingrained in my dna.

My first book out of army deserves at least a small blog post no?

16 days have gone by, and I'm sure the next 6 weeks will fly by too. I just hope and pray my knees and ankle will get stronger and not weaker with all the training. Being on status really SUCKS big time. Using crutches SUCKS even more. But thank goodness it's getting better, I hope I can start running again next week. Or at least slow jogging.

So I've learnt how to use my Sar 21, something I've been looking forward to a long time now. And next week is grenade throwing, can't wait for that!

Woke up to a bright new Saturday morning and I hope being in camp won't be too hard now that I have no idealistic illusions about the people I'm doing this for.

A glimpse of heaven, now back to earth

Massage this ache away

Let go, Ryan, let go.